Managed to pull myself out of bed to see Carolyn-the-Torturer yesterday. I never work so hard as when I am with her, but can only afford to go once a week. I need activity in my life, but working out under her direction puts it at a whole different level and feels great ( about half hour after working out, that is). I made a promise to never tell her I can't do something. I will collapse or vomit before quitting. She is the professional and always brings me to the edge, but never over the edge. I trust her. She laughed when I told her I haven't been running or biking, or doing any activity at all even though I have a race to do in a few weeks. I told her once I fall off the routine, fatigue sets in followed by the Big Slump . She told me she never stops. Indeed, you can never stop. It sucks.
I lack in natural athletic talent, but have come to realize physical activity feeds my mental state. A healthy mental state leads to a positive outlook, and for this I must keep going no matter what. Balance is everything.